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It's 2009, Jobs are out. Exclusivity is in

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2010-01-10

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2010-01-03

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New Year’s Eve War Stories and Name That Guy

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HAPPY NEW YEAR RCB’s (Really Chill Bro’s)!

We know everyone had a REALLY chill New Year’s Eve, so here’s what we want to know: War Stories.

It’s not to late to leave a funny voicemail for this week, call our listener feedback line: 212-203-0483

For the Really Chill Podcast coming out shortly we are piling up the best voicemail stories of the week as well a new game we would like to call: NAME THAT GUY with That Guy

NAME THAT GUY with That Guy.

This is how it works:

  • In the comment section of this post make a really chill statement about a type of guy, and try to label him correctly.
  • Example: “That guy who always has to sit in the front seat – that guy”, “That guy who only drinks shitty beer – frat guy”, “that guy who only flies first class – mr exclusive”
  • Tune into the podcast to see if you are right, we’re going to pick one winner in the comment section to give an iTunes gift card away to, as a prize.

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The Chillest Version of Auld Lang Syne

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Chad Ochocinco: Really Chill Athlete of the Decade

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It’s been an epic year for Really Chill Individuals (RCI’s) from all walks of life. Some faltered, others thrived, but only one chilled the hardest.

After weeks of intense debate and analysis, the staff here at ReallyChill.org would like to congratulate Chad Ochocinco ( via twitter @OGOchoCinco ) on being named The Really Chill Athlete of Decade.

Mr. Ochocinco impressed us for a number of reasons, but certain characteristics stood out:

1. His name

Chad is so brash, he actually changed his legal name from “Johnson” to “Ochocinco,” even though that doesn’t even mean “85″ in Spanish. In the process, he has forced announcers to repeat the name “Ochocinco” during live broadcasts, and compelled the NFL to print this ridiculous, hybrid number on the back of thousands of jerseys.

2. He Raced a Horse… AND WON

Better angle: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kspi6Fuy64M

3. Signature touchdown…and non-touchdown celebrations

Need we say more? He’s bribed a ref, donned a sombrero, grabbed a camera, all while accumulating ridiculous fines (over 60K in one year) in the process. Oh yeah, he doesn’t give a crap.

Chad’s also not afraid to wear his emotions on his sleeve, as we saw during the the Chris Henry game, in which his TD sent chills down every sports fan’s spine.

4. “Child Please”

Ocho created a catch-phrase that instantly became part of everyone’s vernacular. According to Chad, the definition of this seemingly absurd statement is, in fact, rather simple: “F*ck You”

5. Dedication to a rigid McDonald’s diet

Chad admitted to eating the most unhealthy fast food imaginably and yet because he burns 10,000 calories a day, he remains one of the most athletic wide receivers in the NFL.

Oh yeah and did we mention he also played two really chill positions in a single game (Wide Receiver and Kicker)?

Happy New Year everyone and here’s to hoping we can all be as Chill as Ochocinco during 2010!

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[BREAKING] Maino sets Tiger Woods back with new single “Get Em Tiger”

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In an attempt to make money off of the Tiger Woods fiasco, Maino releases a new single (via German Music site hip-hop-news.de), listen to it after the jump.

Just when Tiger woods thought he was in the clear, Maino comes out with a new single going after the “athlete of the decade” in his new single “Get Em Tiger.”  Sometimes I wish I could make this stuff up, but these stories actually write themselves.

What do you think? Get Em Tiger? Hell Yeah

Do Work,
Mr Stereotype

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[BREAKING NEWS] New Apple Table “iSlate” is so exclusive CEO Steve Jobs doesn’t know about it

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In conflicting reports, some tech enthusiasts are calling Apple’s iSlate Steve Job’s swan song. Other pundits in the industry are proclaiming that the fabled tablet device doesn’t exist. Reuters claims Apple is holding its own exclusive event after the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) to unveil the new iSlate to the world.

We here at reallychill.org sent one of our reporters into the field and he came up with the following sound conclusion about the viability of an Apple iSlate.

Phillip Raymore
Reporting from The Apple Store
767 5th Ave,
New York, NY

The quest for the truth about the rumored iSlate device took us to what many people consider the astronomical center of the universe – New York City – where we interviewed former Apple Executive David Cadwell:

If you look at past Apple device launches, our history speaks volumes. At Apple, we have a tendency to deny all rumors until we reveal the final product. I kid you not, sometimes things are so exclusive at this place, we don’t even know for ourselves what we are working on.

My conversation with Caldwell was mind-boggling. I thought I was the only one on Earth to feel this level of exclusivity but apparently at Apple, management actually encourages engineers to work on products they don’t even know about. #THATSexcl. Like any accredited journalist, I verified David’s claims of Apple’s continuous denials of new products, most recently the denial of the iPhone’s existence (via techspot).

Taking David at his word, I concluded that talking to people at the top would get me nowhere. I decided to enter the flagship Apple store in Midtown Manhattan to find out what employees on the ground thought about the rumored Apple Tablet. I caught up with Lilly (who refrained from releasing her last name out of fear of losing her job):

I mean, an Apple tablet certainly is possible. I know I’m supposed to play up the facade that “I’m an Apple Genius” but to tell you the truth, sometimes people bring in devices that I didn’t even know we made.

While her claims were enlightening, the prevalence of skinny jeans, thick framed glasses and hipster fedora’s were too much to handle so we decided to cut the interview short.

We all saw what happened when the Crunchpad suddenly became JooJoo (via Engadget), the Time Inc Tablet concept (via TechCrunch) and Microsoft Courier leaked (via Gizmodo).  To say that Apple isn’t working in this space would be extremely shortsighted.

I made a few more calls, and actually had the pleasure of filing this report on the rumored tablet. Writing on a device that’s doesn’t even exist yet? Yeah, #thatsexcl

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#intro – You’re like REALLY Chill: The definitive guide to a lifestyle of exclusivity and awesomeness

From: The definitive guide to a lifestyle of exclusivity and awesomeness

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Ladies & Gentlemen,

We here at ReallyChill.Org are excited to announce that we are compiling the best content on this site into a manuscript entitled You’re Like Really CHILL: The Definitive Guide To a lifestyle of Exclusivity & Awesomeness.

The book is a numbered guide of all that is like really chill, written by your favorite personalities: Mr. Exclusive, That Guy, Frat Guy, Mr. West Coast and others. Sit back, enjoy a single malt scotch alone at a bar while everyone waits outside in the rain, and let us illuminate the secrets of leading a really chill lifestyle.” When is it appropriate to change the music at a party?’ “What basic steps can I take to make myself more unavailable and, hence, more exclusive? We’ll touch on these life-altering subjects and many more.

If you are interested in carrying the novella in your establishment (we hear that people still go to bookstores these days, even though we ourselves have deemed reading materials anti-exclusive), please drop us a note by contacting us

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The only song you need to kick off the new year

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The Pack – Wolfpack Party 2010

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-27

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