You’ve heard about them in the news and seen postings for their “services” on job boards. “Social Media Experts” – individuals who claim to have mastered Twitter/ Facbeook and can “help you do the same” – are destroying the industry they helped create. Their hardship and anxiety has been a source of pain for the American public.
We here at Really Chill decided to find out exactly what makes an individual a “Social Media Guru:”
Yeah it’s really simple actually,
said Steve, a self proclaimed That Guy (TG).
I just go online, look at the trending topics on Twitter, and play along with the racially-charged trending topics (#ifsantawasblack, #uknowuhood, #indaclub). Obviously, I’m online 24/7 because that’s what makes an expert these days, right? That’s pretty much it, I mean I practically came out of the womb with a keyboard and Mac so I guess I’m a natural.
When asked about dropping “links” on friends and followers, a rigid tactic followed by all Social Media Gurus, Steve said,
I mean, how hard is it to alienate all of your friends with links they don’t even care about on Facebook and Twitter?
What was once a seemingly innocent tactic used to promote meaningless brands has taken its toll on self-proclaimed social media gurus.
We’re seeing a tremendous increase in anxiety and depression among this group,
said Dr. James McDonald, a clinical researcher from the University of Southern California.
Yeah I don’t get it,
said “Ron,” a Really Chill Bro (RCB) who declined to give his last name,
I mean, when I started out as a social media expert, Facebook only had like the cool people in college. Everyone loved it and since I was one of the first adopters, by extension they loved me too. As soon as Twitter and Facebook took off and I put Social Media Expert on my profile, people stopped talking to me… but that’s because I’m an expert, right?
We’ve see this all too often; loved ones becoming engulfed by the last year’s internet trend, “social media.” The toll it’s taken on families and relationships can’t be quantified, but cases of depression due to social media isolation has reached all time highs.
Word has reached the Obama Administration, which declined to comment but pointed us to one of their 209,452,023 websites dedicated to openness and transparency in the social media industry: socialmediadouchebag.gov.
If you or someone you know is suffering from social media depression, please check out the site for tips and advice. Remember, there is a cure for Social Media douchebaggery.
The cartoon originally appeared on Hubspot.



